The dilemma of One child or more?
It’s difficult, really very challenging to decide..one kid or more kids? The perspective varies so much. Me being a working mother, staying away from the family due to our work commitments feel this so debatable. It’s all on me and my husband to look after the house, work, our kid. This makes the ride tough and day by day it is getting tougher to decide.
This subject has diverse opinions, with as many people you speak to, you get varied thoughts but all seems convincing. And hence the queue of confusion begins. The final binding opinion is for sure a personal choice, but I have kept this post open for discussion from all the fellow mamas and daddy’s.
Mixed opinions whether to have one or more kids?
Every time I hear from my mom that it is must to have 2 kids, so that they can have sibling love. The development goes healthier and more progressive. But I question, then what was wrong with the 1st child? Didn’t he get to be more progressive one?
Sibling Love ?
I have seen siblings drifting apart once they get mature and tracing their own individual paths. It is just to say that they are siblings. I really fear that. I think, kids can during their course of life make such friends who are more than sibling to them. Does only blood relations matter?
More Social ?
Yes, 2nd or 3rd kid may be more social than the 1st one. But is sociality directly proportional to no.of kids? As of now, I have one kid and we have left no stone unturned to make him social. Agree, he took little long, but as he reaches 3 years now, I find him way too social. He loves interacting with one an all, even the unknown people smiling at him.
Managing Finances ?
Metro cities are too costly than what people back at home think. Every penny counts. Child has to have a competitive education, Medication plans, extracurricular developments, maintenance of a standard lifestyle. There can be no compromises on the games, daily requisites, foods, health and so many other things. Schooling and medication specially is so costly. I have experienced that Pre schools are costlier than the formal ones. And yes, all parents want the best medical facilities for a family and more so for their child. Managing Finances seem really a big hurdle in this thought.
Then we need that a child should get all of mother’s and father’s love. If mama quits her job, how can just daddy bear so much responsibility of earning? There has to be a balance to get that family life. Both have to earn, either from home or at corporates along with rearing a child the best possible way. We can not always be the best, but we all try to be the best for our child.
A friend at home?
Due to generation gap between parents and kids, it is true that siblings bond much better together. They can discuss issues openly with each other. An elder sibling usually becomes mentor or guide to the younger one.[This is what happened with me personally]. But, I have seen many sibling’s love gets crewed up, full of jealously, comparisons, complexes as well. What then?
Age factor of Mama?
I’ve seen so many high risk pregnancies. I really fear, since complications increase with the age. Those factors leads to undue mental stress and agonies. And that too with a kid at home, waiting to be hugged. The uncertainty of disorders in the neonatal baby also frightens me a lot. In India, the society yet doesn’t accepts much, hence the fear doesn’t gets grounded.
My thought :
I am for sure perplexed of the thought of having own 2nd child. But I think even if someday we tap that we want to have more kids, I would rather think to adopt an orphan. Somebody, who has not been so lucky to get parents love. There are so many kids, beautiful and adorable waiting to land in a mother’s lap, to hug someone they can call parents, and to play with someone called as siblings. Every child is a gift of love full of innocence and purity. Why not complete the family and have a good deed ticked in our lives. What can be more than to give your heart away to a child who is yet to know what love means.
I would seriously request my readers to share their personal thoughts and opinions on this subject matter. I’m also running a poll for this, the results of which will be updated on this site only.
Click here to answer the poll.
Hoping to hear from you all in comments section as well as in poll! Till then, cheers to all the Parents!